søndag 31. mars 2013

the trap of thinking you are the only one

When thinking you are not the only one facing problems and negative situations, when thinking that you are really not that special in experiencing tough days, it all seems less bad. The voice in your mind screaming why-me-why-me will suddenly still.

M.

lørdag 30. mars 2013

my true desires

How do I know that what I want is what I really want? That it is not something that follows me from my childhood or other times, things that I have picked up, about how I should be. How my life should be.

It seems like an hopeless task. No matter what I do it seems like I cannot figure out what I really want. It is strange, it feels hopeless. It cannot really be that hard, can it? I am scared that a lot of my choices are affected by what I think others' want me to do, and that I am somehow dependent of their confirmation.

I need to understand this better.

M.

torsdag 28. mars 2013

ins:pired

Sometimes I feel so inspired that my whole body aches. This inspiration can come from a lot of things, but most likely it is coming from a person.
Someone with a story that is truly inspiring.

I have no idea how to use this energy and inspiration that comes to me. All I can do is lay back, listen to music and really savor the moment, the feelings, the shivers going through my body.

M.

lørdag 23. mars 2013

that voice in the back of your mind

All day long, there is voice in the back of the mind, which gives reasoning for all decisions to be made, thoughts to be thought and emotions to be felt. It is making up excuses to justify whatever  comes along.

The clue, and the interesting part of this, is trying to observe that voice without acting on its demands. By doing this, the noise will disappear, and awareness and presence might become the result.

M.

onsdag 13. mars 2013

I am that person

If I don't believe I am the person I want to be, how can I ever become like that? The responsibility is all on me. I am the only one who can make it happen. It is not like I do not like myself today, I just want to improve. I am that improved person.

M.

tirsdag 5. mars 2013

do less, do more

I am truly inspired by this when writing.

How often do you find yourself lacking motivation? Either you wake up in the morning or you're back from work, and you can't seem to do anything useful? You turn on the tv or you go through every webpage you know, updating Facebook every minute. I still do this (fortunately more rarely than earlier in my life) and I see friends doing this. Some friends of mine don't even see that as a problem. But still, I hear them complaining about days just passing by without them being able to do anything particular with them.

I try to not turn on the tv or update my Facebook page that often. I dance or do yoga, trying to feel my body presence through it all. I work with Red Cross to help kids with their homework. I read. I do laundry or clean up my apartment. I have tea with friends. I work 110%. I also take some extra education. I write. I drink water while looking out of the window for 30 minutes every morning, when the world is asleep. I work out several times a week.

People ask me, how do you have the time for all of this?  I say: how much time do you spend asleep or just laying on the couch, especially on your days off? How often do you watch tv? How often are you updating webpages to see if there is anything new? I mean, I still have times when I go back to these habits. And yes, I do think that a lot of it comes from habits, which luckily, can be changed.

I don't want my life to pass in just one big blur.

The article I started out with stated that one way of gaining motivation is to do less everyday. I agree if doing less means doing less of things that don't motivate you or benefit in other ways in your life. I did a lot and then I did less. Now I do more, because I have figured out excactly the things that gives me, and the people around me, a more meaningful life.

M.

mandag 4. mars 2013

is it worth it?

This weekend has been very relaxing, spending my time at a friend's house in the mountains going cross-country skiing and reading a lot. Still I've had this unsettling feeling in my stomach and the closer I get to Monday, the stronger this feeling becomes.

It is work. I have a huge load of work waiting for me this week, consisting of tasks I'm not even sure how to solve.

So, I do my morning ritual. But today is not a good day. Still,  it makes it all clearer what is important to me, that it is maybe not worth it. Not unless I change my attitude towards it all.

I feel this is the oh-so very common problem in today's society.

What can I do? I can remind myself what is important to me. I can also try to stay present, and this one I think is important. If I am able to stay present I can spend my time off work relaxing and focusing on other things, while I spend my time at the office beeing efficient and doing my best. It sounds so easy, but as my weekend shows, it is not.

When it comes to personal growth, I feel there are always more ways to grow. This stress is one important aspect I need to make some changes around. Still I feel lucky. I'm young and I think being so aware of things at my age, will be a huge advantage for the rest of my life. I am in the beginning of my career [and life] and I am still in the middle of developing the path I want to take.

M.